her vagine was all disorganized.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
