I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
