i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
