belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
