Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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