i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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