Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize