You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
