In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
