Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
