Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
