so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
try to milk me bitch
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