Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
