He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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