Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize
