Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
