i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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