Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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