I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
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