are you so shy because you have an std?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
My Sexting was not on an AP level
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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