We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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