I want to have your abortion
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
