It's like a parade of train wrecks.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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