Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
