Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
