She announced her abortion via fbk
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
