I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
