we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
