Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
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