Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
