He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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