if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
If I had your ass I would rule the world
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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