It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
