I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
