But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
