The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
we should paint friendship bongs
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
