Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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