i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
So much rum. So many feels.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
