Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
