lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
