I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
