Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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