At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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