We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
