Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
