But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
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