We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
