Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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