So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
