Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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