Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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