Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize